It isn't perfect, but it's ours.

Pardon this interruption to my normal assholery.


April 6, 1995. On that day, I nervously walked into the Social Security office to start my first office job. I was hired as a student assistant to help with filing and general office maintainance, and translation when needed. As I walked through the office with the secretary, taking a tour so she could show me where everything was and introduce me to the people I'd be working most closely with, I passed your desk. You were busy. You didn't see me, at least not that I could tell. I noticed your puffy hair and almond shaped eyes. You had, and still have, the most amazing eye lashes I've ever seen on a man. There was something about your demeanor that day that caught my attention, and has held it ever since. You were so comfortable, sitting there, on the phone with whichever claimant needed your help at that moment, so focused on doing your job, on helping someone and getting it right, and yet relaxed enough to laugh and actually enjoy the conversation. I don't remember meeting anyone else that day, but I remember seeing you. It would be weeks before I gathered up the courage to even say hello to you. Talking to you made me so nervous. I felt like a child waiting for Christmas every time you'd walk by my desk. When we took that long walk along the river, talked for hours, and shared more than two relative strangers probably should have so soon, I fell in love with your honesty, your intelligence, and with you. I felt as if my whole life was a dream. 13 years later, you can still make me feel that way.
The day I became your wife was one of the happiest, and hardest, days of my life. Binding myself to you for forever and a day was something I wanted, but not something I was prepared for. Never have I waivered in my love or devotion to you. There have been times when I have felt that being your wife meant being someone or something other than myself. There have been times when I have lost sight of our strength, our connection. There have been times when I have wondered what would become of us. But there has never been a time when I have regretted us. There has never been a time when I wished to not be your wife. The last 9 years have been full of love, laughter, pain, frustration, sorrow and joy. And for every last second of it, you have been by my side, whether I chose to see you there or not. There is no one I would have rather shared it with than you. This life we've made, it isn't perfect, but it's ours, and I wouldn't have it any other way. Thank you for being mine, for making me yours, and for not giving up on us when I pushed you away.