I need to know this. I need to know why some people just can't go a day without being giant balls of suck. It seems as if everywhere I turn, I encounter another asshole. More often than not, they are the kind of asshole you stare and wonder at, rather than the kind you can roll your eyes and make fun of because their assholish behaviour is just not funny.
I have a myspace. On that myspace, I have many current and former students. I pretty much only keep it to spy on the few kids whose lives would give me nightmares, and because they know they can contact me there and I'll help them however I can.
The other day I got a message from a former student. She was in my class maybe five years ago, and graduated two years ago. She was and is a good kid. When she was a senior, I had several long talks with her about what she wanted to do with her life. When she told me she wanted to go to cosmetology school, it gave me pause, but I supported her (in addition to begging her to consider doing something more than that.) I told her she had a huge opportunity to do whatever she wanted. I told her that cosmetology was nice, but that I saw her as a person with more than superficial beauty to add to the world. She had expressed an interest in law enforcement and criminal justice. So I made her pursue that for her senior project, and at the end of it, she loved it and had a plan. Her plan was to go to cosmetology school right out of high school, work and save money, then go to college for a degree in criminal justice or try to get on with a local law enforcement agency and get into the academy. She could still do the cosmetology thing on the side or when she wanted to make extra money. Great, right? Right. She left me with a plan.
Skip to the other day, and she's feeling like a failure. All of the adults in her life, the people who are supposed to encourage and support her, are trying to talk her out of doing anything more than cosmetology. I don't get it. Why would you deliberately try to talk your kid into a life of poverty and customer service? Why wouldn't you want more for them? Most cosmetologists don't end up in Hollywood, catering to the stars. And even those that do, don't make a huge amount of money. THe salon owners do, but the stylists? Noooooo. This kid could do something. She could contribute to the world in substantial ways. And they want her to do hair? Maybe I'm the ass hole. Maybe it's me that doesn't see. Don't get me wrong. There are people who LOVE cosmetology and cannot see themselves doing anything other than that for the rest of their lives. And for them, awesome! I love the woman who cuts my hair. I am thankful for her every time she fixes this mop on my head. But if I went in to see her tomorrow and she told me it was her last day because she'd taken an office job, or gone back to school, or decided on a new career of any kind, I'd be ecstatic for her because she's be doing more for herself. And I want more for this kid. It just kills me that I can't give it to her.
Thanksgiving Letter to the Family
-
Dear Family, Once again, we will gather for turkey and all the trimmings
this Thanksgiving. Trump remains a pain in my rump, but I have decided to
rise ab...
5 months ago
4 comments:
This sounds like one of those situations where her family thinks she should pursue a "gender-appropriate" career.
Not law enforcement, that's "men's work."
But a nice little career in cutting and curling until she can meet a nice man, quit her job and start whelping. Because you know, that's the way it's supposed to be.
I have been thinking about your opinion on this, and I can kind of see both sides; yours and her family's. Perhaps where your former student comes from, being a hairdresser is a respectable accomplishment. It is certainly better than working in a fast food joint. Her may also be concerned for her safety, and feel that being a cosmetologist is a lot safer than being in law enforcement. Her family may have also had negative dealings with the police, causing them to feel that such an occupation is less than respectable.
As someone who has a degree in criminal justice, and has worked the street, I can tell you for sure that a criminal justice degree isn't "all that". There aren't a lot of lucrative jobs out there that call for such a degree. Police work does not necessarily pay well either, as I discovered when I moved to the South. Additionally, there is a great deal of hassle involved when one tries to transfer a law enforcement profession from one state to another (and sometimes one department to another). If you are interested, I can give you all the details of how this is a largely non-transferable, largely underpaid, often thankless, extremely competetive profession.
On the other hand, once one is certified as a cosmetologist in one state, it is no big deal to transfer.
I do, however, understand your vantage point as well. You view law enforcement as being more respectable and lucrative than styling hair, and would like to see your former student, who apparently has a lot of potential, do well for herself.
Whatever she decides, I hope that it is what SHE wants, and what she will be happy doing.
No, it isn't that I feel law enforcement is more lucrative or respectable than cosmetology. Cosmetology is perfectly respectable, and is a great career choice for someone who chooses that of their own will. This kid though, has expressed on many occasions something else. And her family, for whatever reason, is putting pressure on her to just "do hair" (her words, not mine.) Rather than encouraging her to do whatever she wants and is capable of, they are making her feel as if wanting something more, something different is a bad thing, as if not being happy with working at Great Clips makes her a failure. Maybe I didn't make that clear, but THAT is my issue.
Yeah, I can see your point. If she is feeling like a failure, that is definitely a problem.
Post a Comment